Look guys, I have been doing my workouts! I have taken my meds! I am doing well in my buisness!!
I am trying to be happy :D For Christmas a friend got me a happiness journal and i use it daily. Last week I was so down, and I didnt, but i am on super on the way to being better all around.
I am going out with some friends to do an escape room next week and I am excited about it. I hope it is super fun!
Thursday, January 16, 2020
Friday, January 10, 2020
It is the new year!
I literally have no resolutions. I have a routine that I try to adhere to.
I have to remember that a lot of my readers (thanks!) may not know me personally.
Let me refresh though. Right now I am a para. I love my job. I am a very cool para I guess. The kids seem to like me. I sell Herbalife products to help stay healthy I use them as well. I love to read and write, and I go to the gym daily.
For some reason, this last week I have been really down. I do not know what it its. I haven't wanted to be myself. I have had several days where I want to just stay in bed and just stay alone. I have tried to stay myself. I have been looking on the positive of things, but I just don't feel up to it. Even after the gym. I have been avoiding interacting with people. Coworkers and friends at pickup have been noticing and it means a lot that they are noticing. I appreciate it guys. I know I have depression and anxiety. I really just need to remember to take my medications. It is okay guys. (update: a good friend of mine who has been checking in daily- has told me to put my medications on my bedside table, and THAT has been an improvement)!!
Lets get down and dirty. I am 30 years old. I am a single mother. My son has special needs (Severe combined ADHD and high functioning autism also with sensory processing disorder). I make friends with my students very easily.
okay my thoughts are all over the place so bear with me.
I spent new years with a friend of 20 years. He and I just had a good comfortable early morning. We had a beer (well he had a few, not me) and talked about life. We lay in bed, no nothing happened yall, that is the glorious part of being such good friends- we can be comfortable around each other. Anyway, we were talking about how blanket forts solve problems momentarily and that is what is nice sometimes to just escape and be a kid. Maybe that is part of my problem, I have been in love with him my entire life, (we have been friends 20 years guys that is pretty much my whole life) and we never do anything more. Just lay in bed and talk. TAking complete comfort and solace in each others' company.
I am trying to find a second job so that when summer comes, I am ready :D
I have been eating lunch with my student most days because 1 i am off the clock and 2 i like to listen to his stories about gaming. I started to follow him on his gaming channel and he has been playing a few games that I am intrigued with. We talk and commentate on the game as he plays it so it is pretty cool.
I like this guy, and I thought he liked me but he said he doesnt want anything, just to be chill and be friends. No big deal. I have been around him a lot and flirty, and he flirts back. His son and my son are good friends, and I handle his son really well. He is pretty defiant and even likes to hit and kick. Because of my training as a para I know how to redirect and handle the blow ups. So the guy says I inspire him to learn more and to be better, when in fact, he is inspiring me to open up to teachers and ask more important questions about my son's day.
Thank you so much for following along. I know that I have more to say but I cant concentrate. My focus is all over the place.
Just know I am alive and well.
I have to remember that a lot of my readers (thanks!) may not know me personally.
Let me refresh though. Right now I am a para. I love my job. I am a very cool para I guess. The kids seem to like me. I sell Herbalife products to help stay healthy I use them as well. I love to read and write, and I go to the gym daily.
For some reason, this last week I have been really down. I do not know what it its. I haven't wanted to be myself. I have had several days where I want to just stay in bed and just stay alone. I have tried to stay myself. I have been looking on the positive of things, but I just don't feel up to it. Even after the gym. I have been avoiding interacting with people. Coworkers and friends at pickup have been noticing and it means a lot that they are noticing. I appreciate it guys. I know I have depression and anxiety. I really just need to remember to take my medications. It is okay guys. (update: a good friend of mine who has been checking in daily- has told me to put my medications on my bedside table, and THAT has been an improvement)!!
Lets get down and dirty. I am 30 years old. I am a single mother. My son has special needs (Severe combined ADHD and high functioning autism also with sensory processing disorder). I make friends with my students very easily.
okay my thoughts are all over the place so bear with me.
I spent new years with a friend of 20 years. He and I just had a good comfortable early morning. We had a beer (well he had a few, not me) and talked about life. We lay in bed, no nothing happened yall, that is the glorious part of being such good friends- we can be comfortable around each other. Anyway, we were talking about how blanket forts solve problems momentarily and that is what is nice sometimes to just escape and be a kid. Maybe that is part of my problem, I have been in love with him my entire life, (we have been friends 20 years guys that is pretty much my whole life) and we never do anything more. Just lay in bed and talk. TAking complete comfort and solace in each others' company.
I am trying to find a second job so that when summer comes, I am ready :D
I have been eating lunch with my student most days because 1 i am off the clock and 2 i like to listen to his stories about gaming. I started to follow him on his gaming channel and he has been playing a few games that I am intrigued with. We talk and commentate on the game as he plays it so it is pretty cool.
I like this guy, and I thought he liked me but he said he doesnt want anything, just to be chill and be friends. No big deal. I have been around him a lot and flirty, and he flirts back. His son and my son are good friends, and I handle his son really well. He is pretty defiant and even likes to hit and kick. Because of my training as a para I know how to redirect and handle the blow ups. So the guy says I inspire him to learn more and to be better, when in fact, he is inspiring me to open up to teachers and ask more important questions about my son's day.
Thank you so much for following along. I know that I have more to say but I cant concentrate. My focus is all over the place.
Just know I am alive and well.
Tuesday, November 19, 2019
Failure
Someone help me out, i am failing at going to the gym in the mornings. I think it is because I am staying up and trying to get things done for the house but I havent had any luck this week. Last week i went three times, so yay!
I bought a lot of nail polish from my friends, so I have really pretty nails when I go out and coach debate. Some of my debaters are doing well. I know I am looking more professional because I am looking to show the kids that its all about being professional.
I am still modeling for Cato, if you have Instagram, find them CatoSalinaKS
It is fun. It lets me be myself and show that even us bigger women can have cute clothes!
I am still doing my business, and if you are interested you should let me know!! :D I need to get motivated to go to the gym though so any motivational techniques you have, please let me know!!
I bought a lot of nail polish from my friends, so I have really pretty nails when I go out and coach debate. Some of my debaters are doing well. I know I am looking more professional because I am looking to show the kids that its all about being professional.
I am still modeling for Cato, if you have Instagram, find them CatoSalinaKS
It is fun. It lets me be myself and show that even us bigger women can have cute clothes!
I am still doing my business, and if you are interested you should let me know!! :D I need to get motivated to go to the gym though so any motivational techniques you have, please let me know!!
Tuesday, November 5, 2019
New Month New...Wait... NOV 1
I have been down this path before. New month new me...new month new look...etc.
I am trying very hard though! I couldn't get out of bed this morning so I need help with that. I really let myself slide when I got my tendinopathy diagnosis. I have physical therapy for it next week (Nov 6) but at the same time, I really don't want to go because it is super expensive and insurance doesn't cover very much of it. :( At the same time though, I know that it is a necessary evil to continue to have mobility in my wrist.
So in other news, I have gained a lot of followers in the social media world. As a model for Cato, as a cosplayer, and as a distributor for Herbalife.
As a coach, I am 300 points away from my next level and I am so excited!!
I also have been doing well as the assistant coach in debate! the kids are enjoying my company and the coach and I are switching weekends. Our home tournament is soon. Like the 9th. I am super excited for it!
Last night I took my kiddo trick or treating and I wanted to go off on a lady. She wouldnt give him candy until he said trick or treat. I explained to her that he has processing problems, and she went off on how he didnt have a blue pumpkin or a sticker saying he had autism. Like lady, that is not the point of trick or treating. bleh. it was so heartbreaking. But another lady made up for it by letting him play with the science equipment as much as he wanted, which is good because he loves science so much.
I am trying very hard though! I couldn't get out of bed this morning so I need help with that. I really let myself slide when I got my tendinopathy diagnosis. I have physical therapy for it next week (Nov 6) but at the same time, I really don't want to go because it is super expensive and insurance doesn't cover very much of it. :( At the same time though, I know that it is a necessary evil to continue to have mobility in my wrist.
So in other news, I have gained a lot of followers in the social media world. As a model for Cato, as a cosplayer, and as a distributor for Herbalife.
As a coach, I am 300 points away from my next level and I am so excited!!
I also have been doing well as the assistant coach in debate! the kids are enjoying my company and the coach and I are switching weekends. Our home tournament is soon. Like the 9th. I am super excited for it!
Last night I took my kiddo trick or treating and I wanted to go off on a lady. She wouldnt give him candy until he said trick or treat. I explained to her that he has processing problems, and she went off on how he didnt have a blue pumpkin or a sticker saying he had autism. Like lady, that is not the point of trick or treating. bleh. it was so heartbreaking. But another lady made up for it by letting him play with the science equipment as much as he wanted, which is good because he loves science so much.
Tuesday, October 22, 2019
If You are Still Reading this, Thank you
I have been struggling with whether or not I should even tell you guys this, but about two weeks ago I reconnected with a person that I should not have.
Here is the run down. We dated in high school, and a little bit after. Then we dated a few years ago. He broke up with me after a while and I for a weird reason, still loved him, like a lot. I found him on a dating app and of course SWIPE RIGHT!! I still talk with his mother, so I told her about it, presenting it in a haha guess what just happened way. She encouraged me to talk to him through text and gave me his number.
Lets fast forward, to where I told him that it was me and he started telling me that I was the source of all his problems. I needed to commit suicide and I needed to die. Yup. He went on and on for hours about how i was a pox on earth and we all would live better without me and how i was fat and ugly and unlovable. It is important to note here i did not retaliate, I did not respond, I let him talk it out. Then he threatened to kill me. I called the police. He was arrested. He bailed out the next morning.
I can never eat at my favorite restaurant again because he is a manager there :(
Ok that being said, I made plans to go to homecoming at my college for three days. But i had to cancel them because my parents didnt realize their convention was the same weekend. No biggie. I was sad but I can always go again next year. That is how i got over that. I took z to the zoo, a friend came down and paid for it as a birthday gift for the both of us, and all he wanted to see were the ostriches! We did look at other animals briefly but he wanted the ostriches.
Z and I tie-dyed early in the morning so that by night he would be able to see the items before I put them in the wash. It was fun.
I went out with some friends this weekend and DRAMA happened. I didnt drink because someone has to be the driver, but I regret dragging some better friends of mine into this mess. I did discover that I do have serious feelings for one of my friends, but we talked about it late at night and decided it best to just be friends an let things happen naturally if they do. I should mention that it has been 20 years since we have been friends.
I have a debate tournament today so I am looking to show the kids how to dress appropriately and act accordingly. The only thing I did not do was wear dress shoes, knowing that I would be doing a lot of walking around.
I am reinventing myself! I have my business that I am starting to actually get a hold on! I am also getting more healthy!! I let myself slide a lot since my wrist went out, but I am getting back in it!! I love helping people.
Stay beautiful friends!!
Here is the run down. We dated in high school, and a little bit after. Then we dated a few years ago. He broke up with me after a while and I for a weird reason, still loved him, like a lot. I found him on a dating app and of course SWIPE RIGHT!! I still talk with his mother, so I told her about it, presenting it in a haha guess what just happened way. She encouraged me to talk to him through text and gave me his number.
Lets fast forward, to where I told him that it was me and he started telling me that I was the source of all his problems. I needed to commit suicide and I needed to die. Yup. He went on and on for hours about how i was a pox on earth and we all would live better without me and how i was fat and ugly and unlovable. It is important to note here i did not retaliate, I did not respond, I let him talk it out. Then he threatened to kill me. I called the police. He was arrested. He bailed out the next morning.
I can never eat at my favorite restaurant again because he is a manager there :(
Ok that being said, I made plans to go to homecoming at my college for three days. But i had to cancel them because my parents didnt realize their convention was the same weekend. No biggie. I was sad but I can always go again next year. That is how i got over that. I took z to the zoo, a friend came down and paid for it as a birthday gift for the both of us, and all he wanted to see were the ostriches! We did look at other animals briefly but he wanted the ostriches.
Z and I tie-dyed early in the morning so that by night he would be able to see the items before I put them in the wash. It was fun.
I went out with some friends this weekend and DRAMA happened. I didnt drink because someone has to be the driver, but I regret dragging some better friends of mine into this mess. I did discover that I do have serious feelings for one of my friends, but we talked about it late at night and decided it best to just be friends an let things happen naturally if they do. I should mention that it has been 20 years since we have been friends.
I have a debate tournament today so I am looking to show the kids how to dress appropriately and act accordingly. The only thing I did not do was wear dress shoes, knowing that I would be doing a lot of walking around.
I am reinventing myself! I have my business that I am starting to actually get a hold on! I am also getting more healthy!! I let myself slide a lot since my wrist went out, but I am getting back in it!! I love helping people.
Stay beautiful friends!!
Wednesday, September 25, 2019
General update
alright yall!
I applied and got the assistant debate coach position so i have been working with the kids on that. We had our first meet last night and I feel like there were nerves and even though we were practicing and didnt really know what we were doing, the nerves dissipated by the end of the night and i had hyper kids on the way home.
In one of the classes I am in, Intro to Theater, we are getting ready to preform monologues. One kid has decided to do Juliet's Romeo. I am excited because I love Romeo and Juliet so I am helping her do that.
Biology is going well.
Art class is going well.
Overall I feel like I am doing well with everything as far as work goes. I am still struggling to get up in the morning and go to the gym.
My love life is a mess yall. I do not feel like I am doing so great in that area.
I had someone tell me that I look really cute and out of the era all the time and it lifted me up because sometimes all you need is a little compliment to get you through the day.
Try and do good today. Compliment someone today.
I think that I have carpal tunnel in my right wrist. I have been wearing a brace for a few weeks, taking it off to breath once and a while but last night it was so stinky that I had to take it and wash it so we shall see how my day goes today without it.
I applied and got the assistant debate coach position so i have been working with the kids on that. We had our first meet last night and I feel like there were nerves and even though we were practicing and didnt really know what we were doing, the nerves dissipated by the end of the night and i had hyper kids on the way home.
In one of the classes I am in, Intro to Theater, we are getting ready to preform monologues. One kid has decided to do Juliet's Romeo. I am excited because I love Romeo and Juliet so I am helping her do that.
Biology is going well.
Art class is going well.
Overall I feel like I am doing well with everything as far as work goes. I am still struggling to get up in the morning and go to the gym.
My love life is a mess yall. I do not feel like I am doing so great in that area.
I had someone tell me that I look really cute and out of the era all the time and it lifted me up because sometimes all you need is a little compliment to get you through the day.
Try and do good today. Compliment someone today.
I think that I have carpal tunnel in my right wrist. I have been wearing a brace for a few weeks, taking it off to breath once and a while but last night it was so stinky that I had to take it and wash it so we shall see how my day goes today without it.
Dead
That is it. I am 100 percent dead
Not really. I am just really tired. I spent a lot of time in bed this few weeks after being sick. Head cold, allergies, and sinus infection. i managed to sleep it off but then i got a cough that has been killing me and making my throat hurt.
I have not been having the best time sleeping lately and i know self care is important so i am trying to get myself up in the mornings to do reading or any other kind of self help that i need but sometimes i just want to sit in bed and stare at the wall. i was there for thirty minutes today and couldnt drag myself out of bed. it is harder and harder and i am not sure how much longer i can go without just taking time off.
Not really. I am just really tired. I spent a lot of time in bed this few weeks after being sick. Head cold, allergies, and sinus infection. i managed to sleep it off but then i got a cough that has been killing me and making my throat hurt.
I have not been having the best time sleeping lately and i know self care is important so i am trying to get myself up in the mornings to do reading or any other kind of self help that i need but sometimes i just want to sit in bed and stare at the wall. i was there for thirty minutes today and couldnt drag myself out of bed. it is harder and harder and i am not sure how much longer i can go without just taking time off.
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